La Caja China

Saturday was my first cook with a La Caja China roaster.  Though I did a ton of research online there were still a lot of things I wished I knew.  A new user might find this list useful:

1. The good folks at La Caja China never, ever answer an email.  Ever.  If you're thinking of sending a quick question about handles, pig size et cetera forget it.  You're wasting your time.  Bite the bullet and make the phone call.
2. The coals are hot.  Yeah, I hear you but, seriously, they are really hot.  Buy some welder's gloves and don't try to do this yourself.  Those cute little handles the grate comes with will seem really short when it comes time to knock the ash off.
3. To that end, buy a galvanized bucket to hold the hot coals when you're done, unless you can just let the coals die out on the grate.  A fire place shovel comes in handy, too.
4. Beer.  I'm pretty sure you MUST have beer to use this cooker.  If you don't drink, find someone who does and have them roast your pig.
5. You will also need a cattle prod.  Everyone in the neighborhood will filter by at some point - drawn by the smell - and want to peek.  Being polite doesn't always work.
6. You might as well go ahead and buy s'more materials, hot dogs, skewered shrimp or something.  All those folks meandering by will comment that "hey, you could cook *insert grillable food here* on top of that thing."  Don't fight it - just get some skewers and let them roast their wienies.
7. Although my question was never answered, the handles that come with the #1 don't line up at all with the bolts on the box.  I think you have to force them to fit.  I attached the top of the handles and pushed up the bottom to fit the bolt.
8. LIVE WEIGHT: I ordered my pig based on the 70# capacity my #1 supposedly could handle.  I may have missed it somewhere, but the first time I saw the phrase 'live weight' was on the box and instructions that came with the cooker.  You see, apparently the size of the pig is based on what it weighed BEFORE it had all its innards removed and not how your butcher sells it.  My pig, Arnold, was 62 pounds dressed and he barely fit.  I don't know what Arnold weighed before his visit to the abattoir but I'm guessing it was a tad over 70 or 80 pounds.  I asked my butcher and he had no idea what Arnold weighed beforehand.
9. You may want to give some thought to what you're going to serve your pig on - all of the platters you have in your pantry are far too small.  Trust me on this.  We knocked the ash off the lid and lined it with foil, placing the whole affair on a beach towel lined portable table.  Seemed to do the job.
10. A 62 pound pig produces about 62 pounds worth of drippings and fat.  I know there's some sciency type person out there that would say this is not possible but, trust me again, it's true.  Your drip pan is going to be full of liquified fat.  You may need to think about some place to put all of that.  I suggest your neighbor's yard.
11. Absolutely NONE of the parts of your La Caja China will fit in your dishwasher.
12. The edges of the sheet metal drip tray are not rolled over and are sharp, so be careful when you handle the tray.
13. There's a good possibility that your tray may not hold all the drippings and your box will actually leak.   Consider this before you decide to roast on your new fancy patio with those ornamental pavers.
14. I think the box would be a tad easier to clean before everything has a chance to congeal.  You're not going to feel like it but it's probably best to at least do a cursory cleaning before calling it a night.
15. Space - you're going to need space to maneuver the pig, the grates and what not.  No, you cannot roast on your 6 x 8 apartment deck.  Bad things will happen.
16. Unless you have your guest of honor delivered the day of the roast, you're going to have to STORE the pig someplace.  And, like your serving platters, none of your coolers are big enough for this.  I marinated our pig the night before and rested him in the La Caja China on top of 40 pounds of ice with an old blanket thrown over top of the whole affair.  That seemed to work but it was a 50 degree night so there was little risk.
17. And speaking of marinades, if you follow the recipe that they recommend, which is excellent, those folks expecting a southern type bar-b-que pig picking thing will be disappointed.  Try to go with a Latin theme...
18. The sides of your La Caja China are shipped connected to each other - I guess to limit the odds of freight damage.  I was unable to pry the short connector pieces of plywood from the legs and eventually just snapped them in half.  I used pliers to further break the plywood so that it didn't interfere with the legs or wheels.  It ain't pretty but it was better than marring the heck out of the legs trying to pry the wood off.
19. Yes, seriously, the pig does cook in four hours.  Five if you count the time it takes the initial bed of coals to be ready and the rest time afterward.
20. I spent a good bit of time agonizing over the aluminum lined La Caja China and their galvanized steel competitor.  I just couldn't bring myself to use the galvanized version and so ponied up for the more expensive La Caja China only to find out that the drip tray and ash tray are galvanized steel.

That about covers it.  Twenty points aside, the roast was excellent and everyone will remember the event.  Arnold fed over 50 people with pork to spare and the event was a success, in spite of the weather.  And I can't help you with that - you're going to have to work that out on your own.